timradvan.com

I came across this website a couple of months ago and wrote to James expressing my admiration for his efforts. I would like to say a few words on my memories of Tim.

I didn’t meet Tim until Year 11 at SFX, but soon got to know him as a very bright boy, and a keen basketball player. Tim and I became close competitors at school, but we still managed to form a special friendship over those few years.

I was honoured to have him at my 18th birthday party, and my dancing partner at our Year 12 formal. But I can also clearly remember spending an evening at one of the colleges at Sydney Uni revising one of our HSC subjects (probably chemistry or physics) while both spending our school holidays at HSC classes trying to get that extra ‘edge’.

Our friendship didn’t stay as strong when we went to Uni, but I could easily see Tim achieving results and moulding himself into a dedicated doctor. His sudden death does seem unfair, but I can see from this website that Tim was blessed with fantastic friends, and a loving partner. Many thanks for giving me the opportunity to share in your memories. Karina (Harrod).

Happy 28th, Tim.

Time is rushing by us, and here we are in 2005.

Memories are playing tricks, I’m still grasping at things to keep you close to me, even though I know you always will be.

Today is Tim’s 28th birthday. I’d like to thank all of you that have contributed and helped make this into a great collection of our favourite memories. For those of you who haven’t felt ready to put finger to keyboard as yet, we all look forward to the time when you do. Please don’t feel like you have to outdo the stories already here in humour or poignancy; even the smallest recollection of the most minor event means so much to all of us as our memories fade.

Just started a new job this week. Lunch-breaks are giving me a good chance to relax/re-focus. Today (Friday) I found myself thinking of Tim a lot during that hour. I don’t really know why, but it just hit me.

The hardest thing I’ve found, as others may have, is to keep happy memories in the front of my mind, and not get overwhelmed by the loss we’ve all experienced.

I want to keep the things in my mind which make me smile when I think of him, but it’s not easy. The hole left over is never going to close.

All his mannerisms, his complete wisdom and perspective on things, his unshakable determination are qualities I’m trying to emulate at times, and it still amazes me how much he achieved in his short time here.

I miss you mate.

I had another little dream about Tim last night. He was about 12 years old and cooking something on the stove when he spilt a little something onto his hand, causing a small burn. He was at that age where he was trying to be brave, but not knowing if it was serious enough to start crying. Anyway, I walked over, had a look at his hand and said “it looks ok to me mate, but you’re much better at diagnosing these things than I am”. I can’t properly describe what happened next – his whole face lit up, as if being good at diagnosing illness and injury was the greatest thing in the world.

I was talking to Lucy recently about Tim’s lisp – you know the one, how he used to talk out of the side of his mouth. I always wondered how he developed that. Lucy says it was because of his hearing, which sounds fair enough.
It’s funny how you remember little things like that about someone, not always just their accomplishments and the big, important things. The little imperfections that make someone unique.

To my dear boy,
I went to text you yesterday for our monthly anniversary date – it would have been 5 years and 3 months. I got to Rhodes airport and looked at my ticket and saw the 14th and got out my phone to text you, and yes I still have the number in my mobile under gingerbread man. Do you
think I will ever get to the day where I will be able to phyisically take the number out, Tim?
It is funny how travelling puts you in the forefront of my thoughts. I guess it is the amount of time you have to yourself to contemplate and think. And of course there is the constant thought of seeing and experiencing the world without you and knowing how much you would have loved to have been here. No matter what there is always something missing whereever I am – it is never complete because I am without you. That hole in my life, no matter what it is slowly filled with over time will never be replaced.
Thinking of you always,
Lucyxo